Abstract of item: Kain dastar

[frangipani]

Item is a square piece of brightly-coloured, woven fabric, measuring about 1 m². Based on the geometric motifs and the colours (black, red, yellow and white) the fabric was identified as kain dastar commonly made by the Bajau and Irranun (also known as Iranun or Illanun). Given that a prominent motif of the woven patterns is that of horses, it is likely that it was moven for or by a Bajau person.

The extraction of samples for testing was unexpectedly delayed when it was discovered that the fabric is impervious to metal scalpels used in our laboratory. Vigorous experiments based on the hypotheses of our researchers (some conducted, regrettably, without supervision) also reveal that the fabric is fireproof and acidproof. Kain dastar is commonly utilised for headgear (podong) by the Bajau -- that there was an apparent necessity for one that is near-indestructible begs the question as to the circumstances under which it was created and its actual practical function.

Thus far we have unable to ascertain either the age of the item or the fibre used to produce it. A request for the purchase of synthetic diamond scalpel blades has been forwarded to our financial department.

Comments

[jhameia]

Diamond scalpel blades -- the accountants will have an aneurysm.

That's interesting how impervious it is for podong... it's like having a helmet without the metal, maybe?

[frangipani]

At least they'll know the importance of having work insurance with proper coverage. Hmph.

Or maybe it was used with a helmet (like a bandanna or scarf) as well as its usual function? The more I catalogue these things, the less I feel I know.

[nyarlathotep]

But I was going to order my grills! I WANTED TO LOOK LIKE NELLY AND OUTKAST.

WHY MUST YOU SPOIL MY FUN WITH WORK REQUIREMENTS D: <-- (not studded with diamonds)

[frangipani]

Step 1: Buy costume jewelry wholesale from Petaling Street.

Step 2: Spray your bumper with adhesive.

Step 3: Cover bumper with "crystals".

Step 4: Profit.

[nyarlathotep]

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, THAT MY TEETH ARE HUGE? D:< <--- still not glittery damnit.

[frangipani]

This is what happens when you "liberate" items on the catalogue for recreational use, you know.

[nyarlathotep]

HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THE BONG-- I mean I have no idea what you're talking about.

[jhameia]

Haiyoo, sticker enough lah. What for spend all that money on costume jewelery when those handphone sticker crystals are good enough?

[nyarlathotep]

Glue tastes funny ;_;